Bridesmaids? WHY?

When we got engaged I had absolutely no idea what I had to do. We got the venue we, we went dress shopping. No one told me what my girls should do. (I actually still don’t know and in 10 days its WEDDING DAY!)

It was my understanding that you just have your bridal party because the wedding is your reason to party and drink and get together. Yeah apparently no. None of that applied to me anyway. The things I did know:

  • Help you cut out things
  • Holds your bouquet at the ceremony
  • Plans your kitchen tea/bachelorette party
  • Drinks wine with you when you need it
  • Get to know each other. Some of them didn’t know each other at all! Haven’t even met (with 10 days to go, that’s quite ridiculous!)
  • Helps to take the workload off

Didn’t exactly happen that way. Yes I am a control freak and like to do things on my own, but that doesn’t stop anyone from taking initiative… right?


So I was snooping around the Internet to try and find things or a guideline or something for future brides.

During the wedding planning {My Personal and Reality version):

  • Go with you wedding dress shopping.
  • Go dress shopping for THEIR dresses.
  • Buy their shoes.
  • Help with ideas and planning.
  • Plan the bachelorette/kitchen tea.
  • Help with organizing.
  • Help with making the decorations and finalizing them.
  • Go drinking together 😉
  • Don’t cause drama – rather help resolve it.

What the internet says


  • Buy a bridesmaid dress—and don’t complain about it.Buy a bridesmaid dress—and don’t complain about it.
  • Help plan and pay for the bridal shower and bachelorette party.
  • Attend the bridal shower, bachelorette party, wedding rehearsal, and rehearsal dinner, unless there are major constraints.
  • Pay for your own transportation and accommodations on the night of the wedding.
  • Listen to a little bit of bitching.

With that being said… I have dealt with a lot of “bitching”, and it actually didn’t come from me. I just ended it with my bitching.

There are actually so many politics that we don’t always know about. Some try to hide it and then others can’t WAIT to tell you all about the drama. When you are told to “jut leave it”, it’s kind of a ridiculous thing to ask. The weight is supposed to be lifted off your shoulders – not adding to it.

So, girls – this was my list for my wedding or rather what happened during my planning. Please add something in the comments that you felt was also a good dynamic and worked for you and your bridal party.

Enjoy 😀





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